To continue with the saga of the Great Piture Smash of 2010: After I spent some time feeling sorry for myself and cleaned up the glass, I had a little time to think things over. I also spoke to a wise friend or two. It's all about how you look at things, so I'm going to take this as a good sign - since my home is now complete, glass smashing is a 'mazal tov'!
So may I conclude: Thank you G-d, for causing my picture to fall and showing me that I am embarking on a successful path!
In that spirit, I wish you all tons of hatzlacha and happiness on the eve of Pesach, our Festival of Freedom. May the personal chains that bind you be broken and may your spirit be free to soar. Seize the day and do what you love!
xoxoxoxo
Thursday, March 25, 2010
7 Years of Bad Luck????
So here I was, waltzing around all delighted that my apartment had finally come together. In the past few days, I bought a microwave and washing machine, and today I had a really nice picture put up on the long expanse of empty wall in my entry hallway.
All that's left to do is groom the garden, and that will be taken care of post-Pesach.
I was finally relaxing. The long and bitter odyssey of decorating the huge, empty expanse of my apartment appeared to be over - I had this actual thought ten minutes ago.
That all came literally CRASHING down. As I sat here typing up a blog entry for your enjoyment (about the fascinating topic of nuking a sweet potatoe in my new microwave - more on that to come in the next entry), suddenly I heard a great noise. I wondered if one of the light fixtures had fallen off and broken??
I rushed out to the hall and guess what?? My brand new picture (not a Van Gogh but I tagged this entry as such for sh*ts and giggles), that had been put up just hours ago, had fallen off the wall, taking the nails with it, and all the glass had broken into huge shards on the floor.
And there it currently sits. I just don't have the coy-ach (strength, as we say in Yiddish) to deal with the mess now.
And honestly, I'm upset. It's like the Heavens sent me a message: Don't get too comfortable.
To which I answer: Why not?? What is so wrong about wanting to have a sanctuary in the middle of a new, foreign, busy as heck city??
And does this mean that I am being punished for something?? I hate to go that route but I can't help but think that way. When dramatic things like this happen it's important to sit up and listen.
I need to go back and review my conduct over the past while - perhaps this is atoning for something. At least I wasn't under the picture when this happened.
Oy, all I can say is whatever. The gallery owner is coming to get the painting in order to fix it, since he was the one that put it up in the first place. I guess I'll have to sweep up the fricking glass. I just don't feel like doing it right now. Let my 7 years of bad luck sit on the floor for a while and think about what it did.
All that's left to do is groom the garden, and that will be taken care of post-Pesach.
I was finally relaxing. The long and bitter odyssey of decorating the huge, empty expanse of my apartment appeared to be over - I had this actual thought ten minutes ago.
That all came literally CRASHING down. As I sat here typing up a blog entry for your enjoyment (about the fascinating topic of nuking a sweet potatoe in my new microwave - more on that to come in the next entry), suddenly I heard a great noise. I wondered if one of the light fixtures had fallen off and broken??
I rushed out to the hall and guess what?? My brand new picture (not a Van Gogh but I tagged this entry as such for sh*ts and giggles), that had been put up just hours ago, had fallen off the wall, taking the nails with it, and all the glass had broken into huge shards on the floor.
And there it currently sits. I just don't have the coy-ach (strength, as we say in Yiddish) to deal with the mess now.
And honestly, I'm upset. It's like the Heavens sent me a message: Don't get too comfortable.
To which I answer: Why not?? What is so wrong about wanting to have a sanctuary in the middle of a new, foreign, busy as heck city??
And does this mean that I am being punished for something?? I hate to go that route but I can't help but think that way. When dramatic things like this happen it's important to sit up and listen.
I need to go back and review my conduct over the past while - perhaps this is atoning for something. At least I wasn't under the picture when this happened.
Oy, all I can say is whatever. The gallery owner is coming to get the painting in order to fix it, since he was the one that put it up in the first place. I guess I'll have to sweep up the fricking glass. I just don't feel like doing it right now. Let my 7 years of bad luck sit on the floor for a while and think about what it did.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
To-Do: Do not freak out over To-Do List
Let me start by saying that I know I am not alone in creating a prison - כלא - of my own making.
How dramatic. What that means in plain English (or Heiblish) is that I know I'm not the only one who creates endless, insurmountable to-do lists. I do believe a whole genre (or should I say section in Barnes & Noble) of self-help books addresses this issue, at least in overscheduled America. And I've read a few chapters on this myself, with the central message being that one cannot expect to get everything on the list done in one day, so the healthiest thing to do is just be happy with the one major task, or few minor tasks, that you're able to cross off each day.
To which I say: HA!! Do they know what's involved in the life of an Olah Chadasha?? I'll allow you to sneak a peek at my current, endlessly updated list, and then tell me if you could be all zen about it:
*Call washing machine tech for installation (decide if machine should go on porch or in bathroom)
*Have same tech measure microwave area to ensure it will fit microwave; if not, haul microwave back to store in back of friend's car
*Supplicate self to friend with car if necessary as above
*Call Citibank on local American line
*Call Ikea Dude (guy who is returning items I don't want to Ikea for a fee) on local Israeli line
*Call friends A, B & C on cell (Try to wiggle out of calls as fast as possible - hate phones!! Har Har)
*Buy bottle of wine for Shabbat lunch at friend who cooks like gourmand
*Buy pots and pans so can learn to cook like gourmand
*Buy new, צנוע dresses for Pesach as cap sleeved frocks inappropriate
*Wear sunscreen on arms so as not to freckle in insanely hot Middle Eastern sun
*Go running (For real this time! Snooze button is not an option!)
*Learn Israeli culture so do not freak out each time cultural norm is breached (every 5 minutes)
*Get more Crest White Strips so can begin to fix damage incurred by 3 daily cappucinos (Decided that tooth color was a sacrifice I was willing to make in lieu of delicious java)
*Go on YouTube and attempt to watch latest episode of Gossip Girl in five separate parts (likely will see parts 1, 3 & 5). Dream about Chuck Bass for minimum of 10 minutes.
*Read "Bridget Jones's Diary" for the 27th time (literally) since arrived in Holy Land
*Begin saving money - specifically in each of the following 3 jars on my kitchen countertop: Shoe Fund; Beer Money; Girl's Night Out
*Update to-do list
You see what I mean???? Thus far today, I've put my nose to the grindstone (ow) and checked off the YouTube and Bridget Jones items. And I should add "Eat bakery item" to the list since I know I will successfully accomplish that today.
Please chime in - I would love to hear your comments about your personal to-do lists. Happy Pesach (cleaning)!
How dramatic. What that means in plain English (or Heiblish) is that I know I'm not the only one who creates endless, insurmountable to-do lists. I do believe a whole genre (or should I say section in Barnes & Noble) of self-help books addresses this issue, at least in overscheduled America. And I've read a few chapters on this myself, with the central message being that one cannot expect to get everything on the list done in one day, so the healthiest thing to do is just be happy with the one major task, or few minor tasks, that you're able to cross off each day.
To which I say: HA!! Do they know what's involved in the life of an Olah Chadasha?? I'll allow you to sneak a peek at my current, endlessly updated list, and then tell me if you could be all zen about it:
*Call washing machine tech for installation (decide if machine should go on porch or in bathroom)
*Have same tech measure microwave area to ensure it will fit microwave; if not, haul microwave back to store in back of friend's car
*Supplicate self to friend with car if necessary as above
*Call Citibank on local American line
*Call Ikea Dude (guy who is returning items I don't want to Ikea for a fee) on local Israeli line
*Call friends A, B & C on cell (Try to wiggle out of calls as fast as possible - hate phones!! Har Har)
*Buy bottle of wine for Shabbat lunch at friend who cooks like gourmand
*Buy pots and pans so can learn to cook like gourmand
*Buy new, צנוע dresses for Pesach as cap sleeved frocks inappropriate
*Wear sunscreen on arms so as not to freckle in insanely hot Middle Eastern sun
*Go running (For real this time! Snooze button is not an option!)
*Learn Israeli culture so do not freak out each time cultural norm is breached (every 5 minutes)
*Get more Crest White Strips so can begin to fix damage incurred by 3 daily cappucinos (Decided that tooth color was a sacrifice I was willing to make in lieu of delicious java)
*Go on YouTube and attempt to watch latest episode of Gossip Girl in five separate parts (likely will see parts 1, 3 & 5). Dream about Chuck Bass for minimum of 10 minutes.
*Read "Bridget Jones's Diary" for the 27th time (literally) since arrived in Holy Land
*Begin saving money - specifically in each of the following 3 jars on my kitchen countertop: Shoe Fund; Beer Money; Girl's Night Out
*Update to-do list
You see what I mean???? Thus far today, I've put my nose to the grindstone (ow) and checked off the YouTube and Bridget Jones items. And I should add "Eat bakery item" to the list since I know I will successfully accomplish that today.
Please chime in - I would love to hear your comments about your personal to-do lists. Happy Pesach (cleaning)!
Friday, March 19, 2010
Must...Hang...With...Anglos
No need for hello - I'm so tired that this is going to be quick and dirty.
So before I made aliyah I vowed I would not be one of those people that stays in the 'Anglo bubble' and only associates with fellow Anglos (i.e. Americans, Brits, South Africans, 'ya get the scenario).
I have been true to that vow, so much so that I have surrounded myself with Israelis and have not seen my Anglo friends since Purim.
Last night I hit my breaking point when I ran into some of my good old Australian/American/British pals - and spent the majority of the later hours of the evening exclaiming, "Ahhhhh!!! It's so good to be among my people!!! I love Anglos!!!"
So I'm going to be hanging with them for a while.
And reveling in all things Anglo - such as the language, shared cultural understanding and defined male/female roles.
And that's all I have to say about that.
So before I made aliyah I vowed I would not be one of those people that stays in the 'Anglo bubble' and only associates with fellow Anglos (i.e. Americans, Brits, South Africans, 'ya get the scenario).
I have been true to that vow, so much so that I have surrounded myself with Israelis and have not seen my Anglo friends since Purim.
Last night I hit my breaking point when I ran into some of my good old Australian/American/British pals - and spent the majority of the later hours of the evening exclaiming, "Ahhhhh!!! It's so good to be among my people!!! I love Anglos!!!"
So I'm going to be hanging with them for a while.
And reveling in all things Anglo - such as the language, shared cultural understanding and defined male/female roles.
And that's all I have to say about that.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
I'm BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK....With a List
Hello friends, countrymen, bank clerks and taxi drivers.
I am finally back.
It has been EONS since I last posted and although I know you have been devastated, no one has felt the absence of my blogging more keenly than I.
I have so wanted to post my observations, anecdotes and brilliant ideas on a regular basis. In fact, I have thought about nothing else (except cute boys, food, the great weather, buying furniture, Pesach and remembering to call George, my electrician who hails from Cypress and usually needs to do a service call at the reasonable hour of 7am). Nothing else.
However, I was derailed for over a month by:
What's that? You don't recognize those letters? Why, they're Hebrew! And being the crafty girl that I am, I inserted them in an ever-so-blase manner. Yes, I finally overcame my mental block and have begun the long, bitter struggle to learn to type in Hebrew. (And that Hebrew word means 'absent' if you didn't know.)
Okay, enough of this showy display of re-introducing myself! On to the real stuff!
Well, there's no better way to say this but to be blunt: The party's over, people. I am way off my aliyah high and am in the thick of the daily drudgery of acclimating to the Middle Eastern culture, as well as my new apartment, friends, job and the change in fashion (about which one can never say enough times: "Horrors!").
Yes, I've visited Israel many times before and know the language but let me tell you, it is NOTHING like living here. I must admit that I've burst into tears a number of times. Don't worry, I'm okay. It's all part of it, which I know and so I've been told.
Still, I'm going to give you the harsh reality: It's not easy at all. But nothing easy is ever worth doing, right? (Or so we've been lied to our whole lives, ha ha.)
In any case, I am committed to living here for the long haul, so I am just getting on with it and taking it day-by-day (or "l'aat l'aat" as they say here - it's too much work to type that in Hebrew). But blogging can be a wonderful outlet for feelings. So to give you a full picture of what's been going on, here is a conservatively numbered list of things about Israeli culture that I am not, shall we say, wild about.
*Please note: If you consider this complaining - don't read it! (This disclaimer is quite demonstrative of my acculturation to Israeli norms - I am now incredibly blunt.)
ANYHOO:
Random Things That Do Not Cause Me To Burst Into Song & See Rainbows:
1. Customer service is non-existent: The customer is always wrong. The way I see it, you just need to learn the simple fact that if you ask for assistance from someone who is being paid to help you (and not to converse with their co-workers, drink coffee, talk on the phone or do their nails - to name a few activities), their automatic answer will be LO! NO! (It's just a shift in the way of thinking really - the 'no' stands in for the 'yes' you would get elsewhere.)
2. Less Boundaries: Sample conversation:
Random person (RP): "How much is your rent?"
Me: (laughs nervously): "Oh, enough."
RP: "So nu, how much is it?"
Me: "It's what it should cost, given the size and neighborhood."
RP: "SO???? WHAT IS IT???"
Me: (runs away)
(Okay, I exaggerated. But only slightly.)
3. Bizarre apartment norms: Appliances such as refrigerators and stoves are not automatically included in rentals. You have to be lucky to get them as part of the lease. (I did.) Otherwise, you will have a gaping hole where the stuff you normally expect to be there...is not.
4. Beauty school dropouts: The beauty industry in this country is scary. My eyebrows have been made into straight lines, my hair bleached Donatella Versace blond and I have been inspired to buy shiny, Pepto pink nail polish.
5. Bizarre shish kebab: Just the thought of eating kidneys on a skewer makes me sick. But thanks for offering.
Okay, enough complaining. I'm going to take a nap. I'll wake up on the right side of the bed, don't worry. Until then, mon amies...
I am finally back.
It has been EONS since I last posted and although I know you have been devastated, no one has felt the absence of my blogging more keenly than I.
I have so wanted to post my observations, anecdotes and brilliant ideas on a regular basis. In fact, I have thought about nothing else (except cute boys, food, the great weather, buying furniture, Pesach and remembering to call George, my electrician who hails from Cypress and usually needs to do a service call at the reasonable hour of 7am). Nothing else.
However, I was derailed for over a month by:
- My move to a beautiful but completely empty apartment;
- Starting full-time work and balancing that with ulpan; and
- Of course, a girl needs to eat.
What's that? You don't recognize those letters? Why, they're Hebrew! And being the crafty girl that I am, I inserted them in an ever-so-blase manner. Yes, I finally overcame my mental block and have begun the long, bitter struggle to learn to type in Hebrew. (And that Hebrew word means 'absent' if you didn't know.)
Okay, enough of this showy display of re-introducing myself! On to the real stuff!
Well, there's no better way to say this but to be blunt: The party's over, people. I am way off my aliyah high and am in the thick of the daily drudgery of acclimating to the Middle Eastern culture, as well as my new apartment, friends, job and the change in fashion (about which one can never say enough times: "Horrors!").
Yes, I've visited Israel many times before and know the language but let me tell you, it is NOTHING like living here. I must admit that I've burst into tears a number of times. Don't worry, I'm okay. It's all part of it, which I know and so I've been told.
Still, I'm going to give you the harsh reality: It's not easy at all. But nothing easy is ever worth doing, right? (Or so we've been lied to our whole lives, ha ha.)
In any case, I am committed to living here for the long haul, so I am just getting on with it and taking it day-by-day (or "l'aat l'aat" as they say here - it's too much work to type that in Hebrew). But blogging can be a wonderful outlet for feelings. So to give you a full picture of what's been going on, here is a conservatively numbered list of things about Israeli culture that I am not, shall we say, wild about.
*Please note: If you consider this complaining - don't read it! (This disclaimer is quite demonstrative of my acculturation to Israeli norms - I am now incredibly blunt.)
ANYHOO:
Random Things That Do Not Cause Me To Burst Into Song & See Rainbows:
1. Customer service is non-existent: The customer is always wrong. The way I see it, you just need to learn the simple fact that if you ask for assistance from someone who is being paid to help you (and not to converse with their co-workers, drink coffee, talk on the phone or do their nails - to name a few activities), their automatic answer will be LO! NO! (It's just a shift in the way of thinking really - the 'no' stands in for the 'yes' you would get elsewhere.)
2. Less Boundaries: Sample conversation:
Random person (RP): "How much is your rent?"
Me: (laughs nervously): "Oh, enough."
RP: "So nu, how much is it?"
Me: "It's what it should cost, given the size and neighborhood."
RP: "SO???? WHAT IS IT???"
Me: (runs away)
(Okay, I exaggerated. But only slightly.)
3. Bizarre apartment norms: Appliances such as refrigerators and stoves are not automatically included in rentals. You have to be lucky to get them as part of the lease. (I did.) Otherwise, you will have a gaping hole where the stuff you normally expect to be there...is not.
4. Beauty school dropouts: The beauty industry in this country is scary. My eyebrows have been made into straight lines, my hair bleached Donatella Versace blond and I have been inspired to buy shiny, Pepto pink nail polish.
5. Bizarre shish kebab: Just the thought of eating kidneys on a skewer makes me sick. But thanks for offering.
Okay, enough complaining. I'm going to take a nap. I'll wake up on the right side of the bed, don't worry. Until then, mon amies...
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