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Showing posts with label Love Gone Wrong. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love Gone Wrong. Show all posts

Thursday, January 21, 2010

My Belt Left Me Bereft


Curiouser and curiouser!

Being that I finally am in one place for more than one night, yesterday I was finally able to unpack the majority of my suitcases.

I must confess that prior to this I have been - yes, shamefully - essentially wearing the same four outfits over and over again. It's really not a big deal. Everyone in Israel wears jeans every day.

(Please do not disclose this to ANYONE! I have a reputation to uphold, after all.)

Where were we? Ah, yes. So one of the things I unpacked was my prized collection of belts. I decided to wear my current favorite - a Forever 21 number in stretchy, studded black fabric - that very day.

I sashayed over to ulpan with it clipped around my new sweater with drapey sleeves. I patted it comfortingly a number of times throughout the morning. Around 11:07am (I remember the exact moment! Horrors!) I suddenly realized that my belt was no longer on my person!!

What had happened?? I surmised that it was clipped on tenuously and had fallen off somewhere. Oh, the worry! I dashed out of class and was so relieved to find it laying in a snake-like heap under a chair in the nearby lobby.

I re-secured it, making sure it was well on, and continued with my day, trying to forget the trauma.

That evening, I went out to dinner at one of the cafes lining Rechov Emek Refaim (and had a very odd salad, might I add). Oh, I had myself a fabulous time. After I returned home, I was straightening up my new sublet, feeling rather content with myself, when I suddenly realized - gasp! - I was no longer wearing my belt!!

Yes, it had disappeared for the second time that day.

I had either lost it in my friend's car, in the restaurant, or it was gone forever.

For a moment, I was devastated by the third possibility, but then realized that I didn't really want a belt that was just not that into me.

Still, I argued with myself, I wasn't sure of the belt's motivation. So like a teenage girl with a lovesick crush, I called my friend to inquire: Might he have found a belt in his car?

He hesitated for a moment, perhaps pondering what kind of pills I was on and where he could get some, but finally responded that sadly, no, he had not.

Strike one!

Yet I persevered. Today, on the way home from ulpan, I walked (beltlessly) by the restaurant and asked in Hebrew (probably making the whole exchange sound ever more bizarre) whether they had found a belt under my table, around the bar or elsewhere? I could barely look at them, so shamed was I by my request.

They HAD!

I was so happy to see my belt again that I flew into a state of bliss.

However, now that I've had some time to think, I'm wondering:

  • Just why did my belt run away from me twice?
  • Was it unhappy to be found?
AND

  • Has it found another girl it likes better than me? (Is she Israeli? Is she Belgian? Oh, I'm torturing myself.)
  • Was my belt, in fact, planning to rednezvous with Giveret X at the Restaurant of Broken Dreams (and Belts)??
My belt aint talking. I'm holding on to it, for now. But I have banished it to the deepest depths of my belt drawer. My new favorite doesn't just clip, it has a fastener. And it's not going anywhere.